'Shop Contest: Gaming Grows Up, Winners!


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All of the video game characters have taken a hint from Kratos and learned a little bit about growing the heck up, and this week we get to check out what they’re doing with their brand new retirement funds, mowed lawns, and hats with fish on them.

I asked you to make video games grow up, and you put them into a whole new world of responsibility. I genuinely laughed out loud several times while I was going through the submissions. There’s something truly funny to me about putting these superheroic, evil-defeating beings into the most boring and everyday of situations. For these chuckles, I thank you.

Urambo Tauro delivered the winner in a very close matchup this week with a truly inspired and mature take on Link’s understanding of responsibility. He spent so many years breaking the pots, but what if he created the pots? Despite saving the world several times, Link has never really know what it means to put something out into the world to watch it flourish. And, luckily, he has a sword with which to defend the pot from pesky children and adventurers.

Of course, there are a lot of honorable mentions, and I encourage you to go check out the original post where you can find even more grown up and mature video game characters.


Ginger Snap gave us a crossover that Blizzard need to capitalize on as soon as possible. This is pure gold.


ZMAN2018 took the already established canon that Sonic drives a car and extrapolated it to the logical conclusion. Worse, Sonic is almost certainly a Super Speeder.

Apex ‘shop creator sciteach has forced us to think about the job prospects of a knight whose only skill is shoveling.


Brandon0151 melded together two figures of extreme maturity to create the ultimate Mature Adult Human Figure.


rogueIndy shows us that retired boxer needs their own grilling platform, and that goes for video game boxers too!

TBW44 puts the Wind Waker cast into the ultimate mature format.


cecil_banon takes us to the ultimate bad timeline in which Big Boss, out of work and rusty with his CQC, has to stand around a giant slot machine that tells his life story.

ClassicDatsunDebate takes the Firekeeper to a whole new world, and it’s unclear if she will continue accepting souls as legal tender.


I have no idea what is actually going on in the source picture for this, but Mrichston points out that Ryu is pretty good at it.


Mortal Dictata rounds out the end of the honorable mentions this week with the ultimate canonical take on maturity in games. Geralt is going to live forever in his magical vineyard. Also, Triss invented petroleum-based plastics!